For a rivalry that doesn’t seem very old on paper, FC Cincinnati and Columbus Crew feel like they have been fighting forever.
To date, since its dawn in 2017, the Hell Is Real derby has taken place fifteen times between Ohio’s benchmark soccer teams. FC Cincinnati has often jumped ahead early in these matchups, possessing the lead in nine of the 15 matches. However, Columbus has usually come out on top, winning seven times to FCC’s four.
Despite the relatively short existence of the derby, there have been multiple memorable moments between Cincinnati and Columbus. The majority have come from performances, but extracurricular activity has also played a part. The memes speak for themselves, but most have been at the expense of TQL attendees.
Yes, Columbus and Cincinnati fans will denounce the other side, but not all of the interactions have come from the hate between the two sides. After all, let’s not forget the solidarity shared when #SaveTheCrew became #SavedTheCrew.
But in the end, there has been much about the rivalry we both remember fondly and admit we have forgotten. Let’s cover the rivalry in the span of one article so that we can remind the general public how we got here.
June 14th, 2017
FC Cincinnati (USL) 1, Columbus Crew SC 0
Nippert Stadium, Cincinnati, OH
FC Cincinnati rode Djiby Fall’s header and five mammoth saves by goalkeeper Mitch Hildebrandt to knock Gregg Berhalter’s Crew team out of the 2017 tournament. The Orange & Blue would grit out wins against the Chicago Fire and Miami FC before falling to New York Red Bulls in the semifinals. The Crew would right their ship and make it as far as the Eastern Conference Finals.
Unforgettable: Djiby’s header. CST’s own Justin Hoyte produced the cross and Djiby boxed out Hector Jimenez to rebound his header into the net. Arguably one of the most clutch goals in this short rivalry.
Do you remember?: That photo of a may-or-may-not-be-sober Columbus fan expressing his displeasure to Berhalter. By the time the rivalry reignited in 2019, Berhalter would be head coach for the U.S. Men’s National Team, Caleb Porter would be in charge, and owner Anthony Precourt would be given his golden ticket for an Austin franchise.
August 10th, 2019
Columbus Crew SC 2, FC Cincinnati 2
MAPFRE Stadium, Columbus, OH
Despite allowing two shocking first-half goals by Darrin Mattocks and Manu Ledesma, Crew SC fought back to equalize in the first “Hell Is Real” between both sides as MLS entities. Goalkeeper Przemyslaw Tyton produced two big saves down the stretch to preserve the draw on the road (although Gyasi Zardes’ late open-net miss also helped).
Unforgettable: Tyton’s two saves in extra time. The referee indicated three minutes, but extra time actually went ten. In that span of seven minutes, the Poland goalkeeper stuffed Zardes twice in the box.
Do you remember?: Let’s not forget that this was Ron Jans’ first match. The Dutch head coach lasted only ten matches with FC Cincinnati, but the future looked bright at the time. Jans only managed one win in his short tenure before leaving the team in controversy during the 2020 preseason.
August 25th, 2019
Columbus Crew SC 3, FC Cincinnati 1
Nippert Stadium, Cincinnati, OH
The match that wiped away any doubts of who was Big Brother, this one was over by halftime. Zardes and Luis Diaz cut through the back line easily to make it 3-0 after 45 minutes. In total, nine yellow cards were distributed in this sloppy slobber-knocker.
Unforgettable: Zardes’ brace. The right side of the Crew attack shredded Andrew Gutman repeatedly, and both goals from Zardes came from picture-perfect crosses behind Maikel van der Werff. In all, the Columbus striker had seven goals in the rivalry, two more than the nearest competitors.
Do you remember?: Kekuta Manneh’s late goal. The 89th-minute goal ruined Eloy Room’s clean sheet and sparked some shoving in the goal afterwards, but that’s all the Orange & Blue could muster that day.
July 11th, 2020
Columbus Crew SC 4, FC Cincinnati 0
MLS Is Back, ESPN Sports Complex, Bay Lake, FL
The first match after the long break due to the COVID pandemic, FC Cincinnati looked both unprepared and outclassed. Columbus put four behind Tyton in 60 minutes, the defense left in shards by new attacking midfielder Lucas Zelarayan and Zardes (twice again). As lopsided a game as it was, both teams made the knockout stage and were eliminated in the first round by shootout losses to Portland and Minnesota, respectively.
Unforgettable: Zelarayan’s impact. Crew’s #10 opened the scoring with a free kick that grazed the corner of the woodwork in the 27th minute, then produced a curler of an assist to Zardes for his second in the 49th. This would be a sign of things to come for the HIR during FC Cincinnati’s “Wooden Spoon” years.
Do you remember?: Let’s not forget that this was Jaap Stam’s first match. The Dutch manager would only win four times in 21 matches as head coach in 2020, seeing the team out with an unhealthy -22 in the goal-differential department.
August 29th, 2020
FC Cincinnati 0, Columbus Crew SC 0
Nippert Stadium, Cincinnati, OH
If a scoreless draw is played in a stadium with no fans, does it make a sound?
While FC Cincinnati did not score in this match, but the defense did its job at home. The team actually had a clean sheet streak at home in 2020, keeping opponents out of the goal for 389 straight minutes. (However, the Orange & Blue were also held scoreless at home for 467 minutes.)
Unforgettable: Nothing of substance.
Do you remember?: Honestly, we’ve probably forgotten most everything about this match (and most of 2020). There wasn’t all that much to remember, save for Siem de Jong producing two decent shots on target. The Dutch midfielder would return to the Eredivisie after the 2020 season with zero goals and zero assists for Cincinnati.
September 6th, 2020
Columbus Crew SC 3, FC Cincinnati 0
MAPFRE Stadium, Columbus, OH
The streak of poor performances continued against Columbus, but at least Cincinnati left all of the scoring to take place in the second half. Columbus would ride another Zardes brace to their fourth-straight home clean sheet. While FC Cincinnati would not allow fans into their stadium in 2020, 1500 fans watched the Crew cruise to a win.
Unforgettable: Zardes’ brace. Again. Overall, Columbus pelted Tyton with six shots on goal, while Cincinnati mustered zero.
Do you remember?: The fact that three ex-FCC players played for Columbus in this match. Fanendo Adi and Fatai Alashe, part of the 2018 USL squad that “graduated” to the MLS in 2019, were in the Crew’s Starting XI, while Derrick Etienne Jr. came on in the 75th minute.
October 14th, 2020
FC Cincinnati 2, Columbus Crew SC 1
Nippert Stadium, Cincinnati, OH
Broken clocks tend to be right at least twice a day, and the Orange & Blue managed to best Columbus on this day. Both teams produced a successful penalty kick before Nick Hagglund won it with a header in the 49th minute. Crew fans might point out the fact that Zelarayan missed the match due to injury, but the score says otherwise.
Unforgettable: Hagglund’s header off of a perfect Haris Medunjanin free kick. “The Cincinnati Kid” squeezed past Aboubacar Keita and Milton Valenzuela to score his only goal of the 2020 season. Fans will remember the “Ickey Shuffle” celebration, but Haggs produced perhaps his best match of the season at the right time.
Do you remember?: The fact this was the ONLY home win for FCC that season. Yes, the Orange & Blue were doomed to the cellar for a second-straight season, but this was still a quality win over a Crew team that would win its second of three MLS Cups that season.
July 9th, 2021
FC Cincinnati 2, Columbus Crew 2
TQL Stadium, Cincinnati, OH
The first installment of HIR held at TQL Stadium likely established the current rivalry as it is now perceived. Early goals by Edgar Castillo and Lucho Acosta and the red card against Harrison Afful had FCC fans on Cloud 9. However, Zelarayan and Miguel Berry (remember the name) clawed the game away from the Orange & Blue to split the points.
Unforgettable: “The Shush”. Losing two goals to your opponent at home after a red card is painful. Head coach Caleb Porter reminded the fans, shushing the crowd after 90 minutes with a finger to his lips, producing the most visible photo-op of the rivalry.
Do you remember?: Apologies to Castillo and his blitzing goal 25 seconds into the match, but fans have likely forgotten that Columbus could have been without two men. The Crew’s Jonathan Mensah fouled Isaac Atanga, Acosta and Brenner over 22 minutes in the first half, but only got one yellow card out of it, something documented in detail by Andrew Wiebe for MLSsoccer.com.
August 27th, 2021
Columbus Crew 3, FC Cincinnati 2
Lower.com Field, Columbus, OH
The first installment of HIR held at Lower.com Field was perhaps just as memorable for its collapse. The early Columbus lead was wiped clean by uber-goals from Ronald Matarrita and Atanga. Before fans could down their celebratory shots in Cincinnati, Miguel (bleeping) Berry snatched all three points with a late brace.
Unforgettable: Berry’s late goals in the span of three minutes. The Spanish forward scored ten goals for Columbus, but three of them were equalizers or winners against Cincinnati. More brutally, both of these late goals were the result of goalkeeper Kenneth Vermeer coughing up a rebound to Berry.
Do you remember?: Atanga’s 74th-minute golazo. The Ghanaian winger scored on a beautiful curler from the corner of the box to grab the lead. The splendor faded so quickly that fans will often forget that this was the only goal Isaac Atanga scored for Cincinnati’s first team in three years.
Personally, this one hurt due to the sheer heaviness of the karmic backswing. Those of us who lost our minds from the Atanga goal at Mecklenberg Gardens dove into celebratory shots much too quickly. By the time the final whistle blew, those shots felt like cannonballs in the pit of our stomachs. True story.
July 17th, 2022
Columbus Crew 2, FC Cincinnati 0
Lower.com Field, Columbus, OH
Despite Cincinnati’s reversal of luck in Pat Noonan’s first season as head coach, the story was mostly the same. Cucho Hernandez introduced himself into the equation with an early goal, while Zelarayan closed the door late. The Orange & Blue would not score at Lower.com Field for another 135 minutes of play.
Unforgettable: Cucho’s instant impact. The Colombian forward’s goal made it four in three matches to start his MLS account.
Do you remember?: Lucho Acosta missed this match due to red-card suspension. A late red card from a fracas against the New York Red Bulls a week prior escalated into a three-match ban for the Cincinnati captain. People will point at the score, but they will also forget that the future MLS MVP was missing.
August 27th, 2022
FC Cincinnati 2, Columbus Crew 2
TQL Stadium, Cincinnati, OH
What sort of bad karma did the Orange & Blue incur for home results to go this way? Goals from Brandon Vazquez and Matt Miazga were both canceled in bizarre instances—one by a phantom Derrick Etienne Jr. goal, the other by a late Steven Moreira stunner. The cherry on top was the meme of Cucho enjoying a beer tossed to him from the crowd a la “Stone Cold” Steve Austin.
Considering the multiple gifts given to Cincinnati early in the match and the goal by Alvas Powell wiped away by an offside call, this would have, could have, should have been one for the Orange & Blue.
Unforgettable: The Etienne Jr. goal. People to this day swear that Etienne Jr. was offside on his 74th-minute header past Roman Celentano. In the end, Cincinnati had their chances to pad the lead and protect it to make this goal inconsequential, but…
Do you remember?: “The Shush, Part II.” As much as the celebration after Moreira’s equalizer was palpable and hard to ignore, for a minute moment, Porter again held a finger to his lips and shushed the crowd. Granted, the Crew head coach would be fired at the end of the season, but bragging rights went to Columbus again.
May 20th, 2023
FC Cincinnati 3, Columbus Crew 2
TQL Stadium, Cincinnati, OH
Finally, the derby swung in the direction of the Orange & Blue after three seasons of inefficiency. Lucho’s first-half brace once again spotted FCC a lead, but once again the Crew stormed back to knot the score. However, pressure from Acosta forced a bad turnover by goalkeeper Patrick Schulte, and Junior Moreno’s goal managed to be the decider. Columbus would have knotted the score late again, had it not been for…
Unforgettable: Roman Celentano’s big swat. Moreira was in position to score another heart-breaking equalizer, had it not been for the Cincinnati goalkeeper. Roman’s wingspan denied Moreira’s header in the 93rd minute to assure the home win. The save would eventually be named 2023’s MLS Save of the Year.
Do you remember?: Dom Badji’s heroics. The Senegalese forward was essential in assisting Acosta for the first goal and drawing the penalty for the second goal. Had he not been on his game, Cincinnati would still have a home losing streak to the Crew.
August 20th, 2023
Columbus Crew 3, FC Cincinnati 0
Lower.com Field, Columbus, OH
As much as the Supporters’ Shield was mammoth for FC Cincinnati’s trophy room, this loss to Columbus could have altered future possibilities. All of the statistics went the way of the Crew, who had the win wrapped up much earlier than Cucho Hernandez’s penalty kick in the 23rd minute. It’s not a game of excuses, but the biggest reason for the lopsided loss might be…
Unforgettable: The absences of Matt Miazga and Yerson Mosquera. With both defenders missing due to suspension and injury, the defense had to be led by Ian Murphy in the middle of the back line. The lack of defense made it a quick loss to dismiss, but Miazga and Mosquera were not the only ones missing.
Do you remember?: Columbus was also missing Wilfred Nancy. The Columbus head coach had an extra game tacked onto his initial one-match suspension stemming from a red card against NYCFC. While Columbus was leaderless for the match, the talent on the pitch was too much to overcome in this chapter.
December 2nd, 2023
Columbus Crew 3, FC Cincinnati 2 (a.e.t.)
TQL Stadium, Cincinnati, OH
The hardest page to read was the last chapter held in Cincinnati for the Eastern Conference Finals. Despite the familiar 2-0 lead from goals by Vazquez and Acosta, a late goal by Diego Rossi knotted the score, and a Christian Ramirez goal in added extra time sealed the win. Crew would go on to win their third MLS Cup, while Cincinnati had to be content with the 2023 Supporters’ Shield.
Unforgettable: The Ramirez winner. The entire FC Cincinnati squad appeared to be running on fumes, while the Columbus sub was able to redirect an open Cucho header for the clincher. The last goal is always the hardest to forget.
Do you remember?: Brandon Vazquez’s last goal scored for FC Cincinnati. The game’s first goal, formed out of pressure in the Columbus defensive third, could have cemented Superman’s legacy in Cincinnati. Instead, he was substituted in added extra time and transferred to Monterrey in the offseason. Alas, what could have been…
May 11th, 2024
FC Cincinnati 2, Columbus Crew 1
Lower.com Field, Columbus, OH
Before this past weekend, Columbus had lost at Lower.com Field only twice under Wilfried Nancy. The second was this unexpected win by the Orange & Blue late in the second half. Lucho put the game on his back with an arcing assist to Kevin Kelsy in the 74th minute and a knee-buckler goal two minutes later. A Max Arfsten goal in the 89th minute made it a nail-biter, only for Cincinnati to hold fast for the win.
Unforgettable: Kevin Kelsy’s first goal for Cincinnati. The 19-year-old needed only seven minutes to make an impact, but the slow-motion replay of Lucho’s assist made the play that much sweeter to recall.
Do you remember?: Recency bias makes it hard to forget any aspect of this match, but more will likely be forgotten. Perhaps a bizarre aspect people might not know is that this was the 14th time Guido Gonzalez Jr. refereed an FC Cincinnati match. While people will note his bad matches, the Orange & Blue have actually won six of the 14, including this one.
Overall:
Columbus: 7 wins
Cincinnati: 4 wins
Draws: 4
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